18 days until my baby boy is less baby, more kid. E is turning one year old a couple Saturdays from now, and both Jeremy and I have begun that whole "Our baby isn't going to be a baby much longer" kind of thing that I imagine most all parents do. Jeremy has been more emotional than I've been so far, but I'm pretty sure it's because I'm repressing an ocean of heartache until the actual day of his birthday. That's just how I roll. Oops, just writing that created a bit of a leak, figuratively and literally.
My goodness, his first year is almost done. And with it, so many other things, too numerous to write down here.
What I'll miss:
His dependence on us. He loves to go to other people now, and enjoys the company of others. And I know that will continue more and more, as he starts to have a life apart from us.
Nursing. He's still going strong, don't get me wrong, but it's less frequently now, and not as sweet as before, unless he's sleepy. He's usually smacking me or trying to grab his feet, and my. goodness. those. teeth.
Cuddling with him. I think this will come back, but for now that kid wants to MOVE. In the morning, when WE are feeling most cuddly, he's just psyched to see his toys after being away from them all night.
I don't know... He was my BABY. And now he's getting to be a little boy. And while I've made the decision to embrace his growing up, to celebrate the upcoming year with all our might on the 8th, it's the past year that will be on my mind too. And I don't think that will change in the coming years.
And I really do want to celebrate his getting older. He's going to be a fine boy and a good man someday. And I am looking forward to getting to know him more and more and more.
And yet, tears for now.